GG, registered name Graf’s Girl, came to Harmony Grove Farm in February of 2017. I remember the day as clearly as if it was yesterday. It was pouring down with rain, and I felt bad having to put her in a stall when she much would have preferred some paddock time after making the long trek down from Canada. She came off the trailer like a fireball and I remember thinking that she was one of the most beautiful horses that I had ever seen. Her owner had lovingly nicknamed her Black Beauty and there was no question as to why.
The Journey South
GG was born in Canada on a Hanoverian farm that specialized in show jumpers. After a brief career as a show jumper in California, it was obvious that while she was athletic enough she wasn’t mentally thriving in the jumper ring and wanted to do something else. She was lovely on the flat so the decision was made to see how she would fare as a dressage horse. She excelled in her dressage training showing talent for the upper levels and made her debut in the dressage ring in Wellington. All the buttons were there but again the mental game got the better of her and her rider was forced to retire in the middle of her test. Her season cut short; she went back to Canada for a break. Her break coming to an end, a decision had to be made on what the next step for GG was going to be. Her owner happened to be old friends with none other than Leslie Olsen, my dressage trainer. So, with a promising reference GG began her journey to Georgia to Harmony Grove Farm to train with me and be sold.
After a day to settle in, I decided to take her out for a lunge. I quickly realized that the fireball personality that I had witnessed when she arrived was not a fluke and for the first time in my life I lunged a horse with a helmet on. To say the start of our journey was rocky was an understatement but I was ready for the challenge. GG was a bit if a hot mess. She had a reputation in the barn for being spooky and extra care was always taken when leading her in and out for this reason. She was a wide eyed, high alert girl that just never seemed to fully relax. She had earned the name of “Princess” and we were all her staff to attend to her every need to try to make her happy. After months of hard work, we felt had checked enough boxes to enter the local dressage show competing at First Level and see how it went. GG shined from the moment she stepped off the trailer and gave me two wonderful rides that day. I was on Cloud 9 and the confidence we came away from that event with was immeasurable. There is a saying of “never let the highs be too high or the lows too low.” Our sport is humbling, and the humble train was quickly heading our way.
There is a saying of “never let the highs be too high or the lows too low.” Our sport is humbling, and the humble train was quickly heading our way.
The Highs and Lows in the Show Ring
For the next two years I figured out that our first show was a total fluke and that GG didn’t really find the whole show experience to be much fun. She was also very good at expressing herself and making sure that everyone around her also knew that she was displeased with what we were doing. Warm up was particularly offensive to her. Another horse within 20 feet was guaranteed to set her off and she would launch to the sky. I had quickly become “that person” in warm up. At home the workouts were not much better. If she was spooky off the property, then she was 100 times spookier at home. While all this was going on, GG’s owner had made the decision that something needed to be done with her. Selling had proved difficult. At 15.2 GG was an amateur’s dream size horse but had the attitude of a mare that most professionals simply didn’t want to deal with. The decision had been made to turn her out give her another break while they figured out what they wanted to do. It was hard to see all the hard work that we had done come to an end and to say I was sad to know she was leaving was an understatement. As much as a challenge as she was, I had grown to love her as if she was my own. A risk when riding a horse you do not own as a professional. That was when the unthinkable happened and I received a call from my mother that would change both our lives forever. Negotiations were made and in the fall of 2019 GG became mine. I entered our first competition as her new owner shortly after. We had come up with a new plan for keeping GG happy at shows. Workouts at home were going well enough and we were ready to see if our new plan would work to our benefit. Saturday, we had an amazing show and all our hard work was proving to have paid off. The scores were getting better and the mistakes were getting smaller. But this sport is humbling and Sunday GG came up lame and we had to scratch. The mare that hadn’t taken a lame step since I had been riding her was lame. So, we scratched and went home and luckily after a week a beautiful abscess blew and we started back to work to get ready for the Spring season in 2020.
One pandemic later, our show season had been cancelled and the workouts at home were just not where they needed to be. I made the decision to let her have a light summer. She never loved our Georgia heat and I thought the easy workout routine would do us both some good. In August of that year we took our first lesson with Michael Pollard as a last minute decision when a spot had opened up in a clinic I was organizing. In true GG fashion, she showed off all her impressive feral moves for everyone to see. It is a lesson that we can laugh about now but at the time I was honestly just happy to survive. This lesson jump started a new program for us though riding with Michael and seeing if he could help me work through these mental blocks that we had. I will never forget that first winter after a particularly wonderful lesson and having Michael look at GG and expressing how excited he felt. Like he was a part of something special with my journey with GG. That Spring we entered our first show of the season at Second Level and improved our scores greatly. Things were looking up. It wasn’t always perfect, and we still had some things to work through but we were heading in the right direction. We went into winter training with the goal of moving up to Third Level the following Spring and got to work.
The Transformation
We were all noticing a change in GG during this time. She had gone from a wide eyed high alert mare to a soft eyed lazy walking mare when leading around the farm. You could walk up to the fence and call her name and she was guaranteed to look your way and walk over. If you walked in to the field she was the first one to walk your way and see what you were doing. She was the horse that you wanted to talk to and she wanted you to talk to her. We had always known she was a sweet horse but her kind and cuddly disposition had really come out. She was a mare that you couldn’t help but love. She became a traveling pro, easily hauling for lessons and was content to spend hours hanging out at the trailer with her hay net. There was no drama. There was no stress. We had become a team and we were having so much fun together.
Spring of 2022 arrived and we were close but not quite ready to compete. Instead, we made our debut at Third Level in May at Chattahoochee Hills. We finished the weekend scoring 65% and finished the requirements for my Bronze medal. She tried her heart out for me. There was room for improvement on both our parts but the pieces were finally coming together. For the first time in years the dream of riding at an FEI level was coming into view. Our goal of earning a Bronze medal was now looking small and we were making new and bigger goals for the coming year. In September we had what I would call the best lesson we had ever had together. The lateral work was strong. The changes were getting better. We were both getting stronger. Fourth Level was looking very possible and Prix St George would not be far behind that. I dared to dream and did so with confidence.
The following week we entered what would be our last competition at Third Level. I had been satisfied with her performance at the previous show but needed a few more scores for year end awards and I was eager to use that opportunity to see if we could improve on what we had already done. We had fantastic rides leading up to the weekend. We were ready. The day was not to be ours though and I was reminded how humbling this sport really is. GG seemed to be lacking something in all her tests and I chalked it up to her being tired after just a long summer working. We went home not feeling defeated but with the plan to take a break and continue with our training and get ready for the next season. GG seemed to enjoy her break. Eating carrots and Bemer sessions were how she spent her days….as a true Princess should. She got to roll in the field and be dirty and enjoy all the perks of being a horse.
A Turn for the Worse
As the time approached to start back into work, GG seemed to have taken a decline in her comfort level. I quickly scheduled for her to have a check up with our local vet where she was diagnosed with ulcers. We immediately started treatment with the plan to extend her break and then have a lighter training season through the winter. We enjoyed cross training with trail rides and ground work and this seemed like the right option for her moving forward for the time. I brought her home on the Friday from the clinic and she seemed somber but happy. Her appetite was good and she was her usual snuggly self. The next morning I received a call that GG had collapsed when she was caught to come in out of the field for breakfast. I rushed to the farm and hauled her quickly back to the vet clinic where we were promptly referred to Auburn due to GG experiencing internal bleeding. I hauled to Auburn as quickly as I could where a team was waiting for our arrival. The wait in the parking lot while they worked on her was torture. When the doctor finally came out to talk to me, I knew it was not good news by the look on her face. During the exam it was discovered that GG had cancer. We were waiting on pathology to come back to confirm but the ultrasound showed that the cancer had spread from her spleen to her liver and a tumor had ruptured. There was no decision to make. The diagnosis made the decision for me. I spent the next two hours loving my horse that had made my dreams come true. We grazed in the sun and I told her how special she was. I stayed with her until the end. I was the only one down there with her and I will hold those final moments alone with her close to my heart forever.
We later learned that the type of cancer was hemangiosarcoma which is very rare in horses. It is more common in dogs and to see it in a horse was described as just very bad luck. It is very aggressive and there was no treatment option.
I have been very lucky in my life to have ridden and owned some wonderful horses. Anyone that knows me knows that I have a soft spot for mares. A good mare will challenge you but they will also fight for you if they deem you worthy. I was lucky have GG come into my life. She challenged me in ways that I never knew a horse could. She not only made me better. She made me want to be better for her. I wanted to be the rider that she deserved. As a kid I would watch Black Beauty over and over again falling in love with the story of finding a horse that touched your heart so deeply. Little did I know that I was destined to have my own Black Beauty. GG may be gone but she will always have a special place in my heart. I will always be grateful for the rides that we shared, the good and the bad. Thank you for making my dreams come true sweet girl. You are missed….